Hi
Everyone,
2014, from its start to finish, and especially the season of Christmas was determined to teach me much. In fitting together the year’s puzzle pieces, I have learned that the traditions and celebrations we share as family and friends are invaluable. I’m reminded as I look back on each highlight that every memory is so vital to my life’s story. In February, we celebrated Daniadh joining our family, Tim and Rachel’s Scottish shepherd. In March, we supported my mother in her move to the Parker Personal Care Home. In April, Tim and I rejoiced in the news of becoming expectant grandparents. In May, we celebrated the engagement of my son to his lovely fiancée Rachel Horne. In June, I cherished each and every memory our entire family shared during our week’s vacation at Folly Beach in Charleston, SC, (my grandson’s “reveal party,” my sister Lori’s “60th birthday,” and “kayaking with dolphins!”). In July, after two weeks of study in Yogaville, VA, I celebrated earning a certification in Heart and Cancer Therapeutic Yoga. In August, our family gathered for a weekend in Washington, D.C., to honor my daughter’s marriage to Andy Schulz. In September, more celebrating ensued as I proudly hosted in our home a baby shower for my soon to be born grandson. September was an exceptionally busy month of celebrations. We attended a neighbor's wedding and celebrated my brother-in-law and sister-in-laws' anniversary. In October we joined them again at their surprise 60 birthday and retirement party. All of these joyous occasions were preparatory for the most amazing event of the year, the birth of my grandchild, Ike Anderson Schulz, on October 30, at Walter Reed Medical Center. Since the day I helped my daughter birth Ike into this world, and Tim and I became grandparents, my heart has not been the same. Life just seems different.
Only days before Ike’s birth, at the October book club, I felt a strong sense that a change was about to occur. I noticed it first when we canceled our club’s yearly Christmas party on the premise that holidays were just too hectic a time to celebrate (what were we thinking?). In November, smashing into a deer and tarnishing our record with Erie Insurance was another indication that 2014 was not to end as it started. Recalling back to just before Thanksgiving, I even canceled my annual family Christmas Eve party, one I have hosted for exactly 30 years, reasoning that it was because my children would not be attending (I’ll never cancel again!). Luckily, our family celebrated Thanksgiving at our home and we enjoyed five days with our grandson, introducing him to friends and family - cousins, aunts, uncles, and “great-grandparents.”
Then December arrived, and we were caught off guard. Less than two weeks after my children returned to their out-of-state homes from our Thanksgiving holiday, we called for them to return to Butler, unexpectedly, to say their good-byes to their beloved grandmother. Staying only a few days then returning again to their homes, once more we called them to drive back for their grandmother’s funeral service. In retrospect, it is clear that in 2014 there was a paradigm shift. It was the closing of another chapter in my life’s story while the start of another, as if the honor of grand-parenting had been passed on to me like an Olympic torch, and with it, more puzzle pieces to fit together, to write my trilogy.
As the year comes to an end and we have literally greeted one new life and let go of another, I am reminded that the true gifts of this holiday season, this existence, are the times we spend together with the ones we love. My mother-in-law’s gift-giving heart shines as a model to me. Her benevolent nature united us as a family, for every occasion, no matter how small; she celebrated each with a gift. But her true legacy, which is now very clear, is not in the gifts she gave, but in the “spirit” in which she gave them. Consequently, it is her spirit, I hope, that will always remain with us.
With that noted, our book club, Butler Women of Wisdom, with a corresponding generosity, donated to the Butler Hospital again this year. In the spirit of sharing our love of books, our secretary Cheryl will use the money we collected to provide another of the hospital’s centers with a reading corner for children. Cheryl organized a favorable library with our contributions last year, so I am certain this year's dollars will provide many more children with cherished moments of reading.
In December our book club met to discuss the novel Crazy Rich Asians by Kevin Kwan. Like our own lives, the lives of Kwan’s characters are carefully constructed. Kwan rooted them in Chinese aristocracy; their lineages may be traced back to family fortunes. With multiple ancestral histories, it was sometimes difficult to keep track of the puzzle pieces that supported Kwan’s characters. Despite this fact, the great lengths the author took to introduce minor characters such as Eddie Cheng, the tyrant husband of Fiona and abusive father of 3 children; and Alistair Cheng, the wayward son of the Shang fortune who shamed the family with his engagement to a soap opera star, cultivated the ground for developing the main characters, Nick Young and Rachel Chu, who ultimately overcame the idiotic influence of their crazy rich Asian relatives and acquaintances.
In Kwan’s novel, despite the disgustingly lavish living and selfishness of many of the characters, there were archetypical heroes and heroines who did not take their inherited or earned wealth for granted and, like my mother-in-law Marilyn, understood the true meaning of gift-giving. In the spirit of the season, I’ll speak of them as the three wise “the wonderfully wise” the magi. Nick Young, Peik Lin, and Charlie Wu were acute to the needs of those whom they loved and unselfishly provided for them. The first of the wise, Charlie, gave up on the love of his life, the stunning and beautiful Astrid Leong, only to help her win back the man of her dreams, her husband Michael. By buying Michael’s company for millions above its value, Charlie hoped to restore Michael’s dignity, so that Michael might feel worthy of Astrid’s crazy rich Asian family. The second wisest, Peik Lin, the granddaughter of a self-made millionaire in Singapore, thinks nothing of spending thousands on a wardrobe for her longtime friend Rachel Chu, so that Rachel may appear remarkable and acceptable to her boyfriend Nick Young’s snobbish family.
Finally, the wisest of the wise, Nick, our heroine, a humble and modest heir of a fortune, performs the knight on the shining white horse scene at the end of the novel by restoring Rachel’s faith in his sincerity. He flies his private jet across the world to California and returns to Singapore with Rachel’s mother so that mother and daughter can restore their recently damaged relationship. Similarly, the spirit of these three wise gift-givers is “true” and “true” is defined by “devoted.” “Devoted,” in fact, in its original context means “loving.” Nick, Peik Lin, and Charlie gave without concern for their own discomfort or benefit. But as love is always a resulting benefit in gift-giving, as was my mother-in-law, all those who are wise are ineffably motivated by devotion, by love.
Crazy Rich Asians was a mutually enjoyable book. Although it was not a book in which words of wisdom were provided in context but were more or less provided in the actions of the characters. We learned both through their displays of ego and prejudice as well as through their acts of generosity and humility.
Our December meeting was held at Mac’s Café in Butler. Cheryl, Ginnie, Jody, Lori, Sharon, and I convened for breakfast along with Cheryl’s friend Nadine and my sister Theresa and brother-in-law Bob. After dining and our discussion of Crazy Rich Asians, we embarked on our annual Pittsburgh Symphony Christmas Home Tour. As always, it was a day filled with inspiration combined with friendship. Our time spent oohing and ahhing over the beauty and creativity of the homes is, for me, an early Christmas “gift.” It is a puzzle piece I eagerly anticipate every holiday season!
Looking forward to our next book, we will step away from the privileged lives of the very rich and enter into the world of the working class. Translated from German into English, The Glass Blower by Petra Durst-Benning is a historically researched book. Again, our story is pieced together by the lives of 3 sisters, “the wise.” Following the passing of their father, they find themselves struggling to survive in a man’s world. We will find inspiration in these strong women as their motivation and ingenuity proves their equality among the chauvinistic men of their time. The Glass Blower also includes a touching love story in addition to the credible account of the culture and history of Germany. Join us on Monday, January 19, at Natilie’s Pizzeria in Butler at 6 PM to discuss the plot of this promising novel.
Thank you all for a great year of book discussions. The titles
we enjoyed were diverse: entertaining, educational, spiritual, biographical,
historical, and humorous. I’ve included the updated history of our book club’s
titles so that you can reminisce over this year’s reading and books of yore.
Happy Holidays,
Tammy
